How to share wedding photos with parents and family

Tell the couple to share the gallery link, not downloaded files; to tell each parent which download to use; to ask parents to make a favorites list instead of sending screenshots of what they want printed; and to hide anything they do not want the whole family to see before the link goes out. That is the whole method. It stops the four problems that otherwise come back to you: the mother who has 900 photos in a text thread, the father who printed a web-size file at 16 x 20, the list of “the ones I like” sent as 30 screenshots, and the aunt who saw the getting-ready photo.

Photographers get these questions because couples get them from their parents, and couples do not know the answers. Put the answers in the delivery email once and you will not get asked again.

Share the link, not the files

Couples want to send parents the photos. They AirDrop 200 of them, or text 40, or email a ZIP that never arrives. Each of those produces a different set of photos at a different size, and nobody can find anything a month later.

Tell the couple: send the gallery link and the password, if there is one, and nothing else. Parents open the same gallery the couple has, in the browser on whatever device they own, with the photos in the same order and the same sections. When a parent asks for “the one of us at the table”, the couple says “section 6, halfway down” instead of searching their camera roll.

If the gallery has a password, the couple sends it in the same message as the link. If there is an expiry date, the couple tells them that too, once, and again a month before. What each of those settings does is in the password vs email protection guide, and it is worth the couple knowing that neither one stops a parent from forwarding the link.

What to tell parents about downloads

Parents download the wrong thing more than any other group, because the options mean nothing to them. Give the couple this table to forward.

A parent wants to	Download	Tell them
Show photos on their phone, post them, text them to a friend	Web size, one photo at a time	Smaller files, quick, fine for screens
Print, frame, or make their own album	High resolution	Big files, slow on a phone, use a computer
Keep a full copy for safekeeping	The whole gallery as a ZIP, high resolution	Use a computer; large galleries arrive as an email link with a time limit
Get the photos from one part of the day	One section as a ZIP	Same, smaller

Two details prevent most of the support email. First, a large ZIP is delivered as an emailed link with a time limit; in FOCL Galleries that link is valid for 7 days. Tell parents to download it that week and to check their spam folder. Second, a ZIP on a phone is a bad experience. Tell parents to do the full download on a laptop, once, and use the phone for web-size single photos.

If the gallery has a download PIN, the couple decides who gets it. Rule of thumb: both sets of parents, and nobody else, sent in the same message as the link. Getting the couple themselves to download is a separate problem, covered in how to get couples to download their gallery.

Favorites lists instead of screenshots

Parents choose prints by sending the couple screenshots, or by describing photos in words. Neither works for ordering.

Tell the couple to ask each parent to make a favorites list in the gallery with their own name on it: “Mom’s prints”, “Dad’s album”. The parent hearts photos into the list, the list is saved against their email, and the couple and the photographer can both see it with the filenames attached. Ordering prints becomes “print Mom’s list, 5 x 7”, and a parent album becomes the list plus an hour of layout. The album design guide covers the album side.

In FOCL Galleries, favorites lists are named, they follow the email across devices, and the photographer sees them by person or by photo and can copy the filenames or export a CSV. Parents who want prints can order them through the gallery’s print store, with prints by WHCC.

Private photos

Before the link goes to anyone, the couple decides what the family should not see. Usually that is some of the getting-ready photos, a few frames from the end of the night, and anything with a guest the family has feelings about.

There are three ways to do it, and the couple should know all three.

• The photographer hides the photo. Nobody sees it. Use this for anything the couple never wants to surface.
• The photographer makes it couple-only. The photo opens to anyone who enters the couple’s email address, so it stays out of the way of an ordinary guest browsing the gallery. Use this for the photos the couple wants to keep but would not lead with in front of their parents. It is a filter, not a lock: the couple’s address is known to most of the family, so anything that must not be seen at all should be hidden instead.
• The couple hides it themselves. Some gallery platforms let the couple hide photos from guests without going through the photographer. In FOCL Galleries this is Couple Controls: the couple enters a 6-character code and hides photos from guests, and the photographer can see what they hid and restore it if asked.

Say to the couple, in the delivery email: “Go through the gallery once before you send the link to family. Anything you would rather they did not see, hide it, or send me the filenames and I will make it couple-only.” Most couples hide 5 to 20 photos and the family never knows.

A photo hidden from guests is still in the couple’s gallery. If a parent is looking over the couple’s shoulder, they will see it.

Parents who struggle with the technology

Some parents will not manage a link, a password and a download on their own, and the couple ends up as support staff. Three things help.

• A printed card. The gallery address and the password, on a card, in the hand.
• One email address per person. If the gallery asks for an email to save favorites, each parent uses their own, not a shared family address, or their favorites will merge with someone else’s.
• A 10-minute walk-through, on the phone, once. The couple opens the gallery with the parent on a call and shows them the sections, the heart, and the download button.

The paragraph to give the couple

Put this in your delivery email so the couple can forward it to family as it is.

Here is our wedding gallery. Open the link on any device and enter the password if it asks. To save a photo to your phone, use the web-size download. If you want to print anything, download the high-resolution version on a computer. If you want prints from us, heart the photos you like into a list with your name on it and we will order them. The gallery is open until [date].

The gallery delivery email templates have a version for the couple and a version for family.

When the family is complicated

Divorced parents, a parent who is not speaking to the couple, a sibling who should not have the password. The couple knows. Ask once, at delivery: “Is there anyone who should get a different link, or none?” Some platforms let you make a second gallery with a different selection and a different password for a different branch of the family. That is more work, and when the couple asks for it, it is worth doing.